30 Day 'About Me' Challenge - Day 5

Day 5: Something you are really looking forward to:


I am REALLY looking forward to the upcoming marriage of my in-laws-to-be!
Cal's dad John, and stepmum Val, are getting married this October and it's going to be so lovely! Oooh, and i have the most AWESOME Hell Bunny dress that I got just for the wedding! 

         THE DRESS!!!!                    
         THE HAPPY COUPLE!!!!!








I just know it's going to be an amazing wedding, they 
are a brilliant couple and I can't wait to be an official
part of the family (when me and Cal tie the knot.....
whenever that might be!!)


But i really need to find a pair of shoes that'll go...........


Loveages! <3 <3 <3

30 Day 'About Me' Challenge - Day 4

5 Interesting Things About Your Family:


Hmmm. My family. Quite a strange lot. 


(1) All four of my siblings have been abroad at some point, but I have not.
(2) My maternal grandparents nearly lived in South Africa when my mum and Uncle Ray were young. Lucky they had to come back! Or I'd not be here!
(3) My mum has a degree in baking.
(4) My uncle Ray is a musical genius, and there's not alot that he can't play. 
(5) My stepmother-in-law, Val, used to be a part of the Filipino Royal Family.




loveages!!! <3 xxx

30 Day 'About Me' Challenge - Day 3

A Picture Of You When You Were A Baby:


I thought I'd give you more of a 'timeline', rather than just one picture ^_^
In these photos, my age ranges from my 1st birthday, to age 20 <3

                        <----- me with face paint on at age 4
                                                        
                                                                  
                        my first birthday! my mummy made
                        the cake                        --------------->                                                          

            
          <----- me aged 4!
            
          me, my folks, my auntie Fi 
          & unk Ray, my big sis Chelle
          and big cousin Amanda ------>                                                   

                                                        
       <-----me, my wee sis Samantha & big sis Chelle, at Sammi's Holy Communion


                       me at Halloween aged about 8 ------------------->

                                                                    
     <---- me and my amazing grandad, James Sutherland. R.I.P.


    me at my thinnest, my 18th birthday party ------------>






   <------------me and my mum at my 18th






                                                                                                                                    






<----------- me and my tremendous Uncle Ray








                me and one of my bestest mates, G  ---------->

 <-------------- me and G again!






 <----------- me and one of my besties, Iain






    

         <----------- Johno, me and G






            me and my dad, Billy ---->




   <----------------- me and my besties,
     Louise and Mandy

                                                                        
       me, my wee sis Sam, and my big sis Chelle, on Chelle's 21st birthday ---------->

                                (below) me and Chelle

   <----- my folks
                    
                                                         
















So, there's my life in pictures! That'll be all for now!
Loveages <3 xxx

Rhian Facts!

Here's the lowdown on all things Rhian, just because she's awesome and everyone loves her!




1 - Date of birth: 21-01-09
2 - Time of birth: 8:10pm
3 - Weight at birth: 7lb 11oz
4 - Full name: Rhian Ray McNeil (she has her dad's last name)
5 - She's named after my awesome Uncle Ray.
6 - She's also named after the Fleetwood Mac song, 'Rhiannon'
7 - The first jar food she ate was Beef Stew. She hated it!
8 - Her favourite stuffed toy used to be a wee giraffe named Gerald.
9 - Rhian's first word was 'hiya'
10 - She's about to become a big sister, her dad's girlfriend was due 5 days ago.
11 - She can't go to bed without being read to.  

12 - She can't sleep without her doggie, Brandi, and her hedgehog, Bub.
13 - Her first pet was Rhino the hamster (at her dad's)
14 - And her 2nd and 3rd pets were Bunny and Havok (mine!)
15 - Everytime the traffic light goes green, she yells "green man! yaaayyyyy!"
16 - She calls most of her drawings 'sunshine'
17 - Her favourite TV programme is Waybuloo, and she loves Lau Lau the best.
18 - She's obsessed with Hello Kitty and Peppa Pig.
19 - During EVERY car journey, she sings Balamory.
20 - She LOVES apples.
21 - She's not allergic to anything.
22 - Her favourite music is by Lady Gaga and 30 Seconds To Mars. She particularly loves Bad Romance, either version.
23 - She knows what her name looks like.
24 - She can count to 10.
25 - She calls Hello Kitty, 'Hello Kitty Cat'
26 - Fudge and Milkybar are her favourite sweeties.
27 - If she could, she'd live in my gran and grandad's big trampoline.
28 - She loves going down the slide.
29 - Her favourite pen is a neon yellow one :)
30 - She doesn't like getting her hair washed.
31 - She likes flashing her belly button.
32 - She's used her potty twice!!!
33 - Whenever someone says to her "you're gorgeous", Rhian says "no, Rhian beautiful!"
34 - When she wants something, she says "pleeeeeeeease!" with a cute grin.
35 - She is the absolute light of my life. And she knows it!








And that is all for now! Loveages!!!


<3 <3 <3 Claire xxxx

Just The Way It Is - BPD

There's not a huge amount that you know about me at this point, but I now know that some of the things I've seen, felt, and still feel, are things not everyone can talk about.
Recently, I've been inspired by Emma Louise. She spoke honestly about her pre-natal depression, and her ongoing depression. Emma is a strong mother who obviously loves her son Cameron millions, but still points out that having depression can make things that bit harder. Mental illness is still a taboo subject for most, and that is probably why very few people ever hear about our personal struggle, because we are scared of being judged too harshly. Someone I'm close to told me, during one of my worst spells, that "depression isn't even a real illness. Just cheer up."
Seriously.
This, inevitably, hurt me more and made me feel pretty stupid. It took me a while to get over that and just accept that everyone will always have their own view on these things. It's just completely absurd to me, but that's just me. 


I was diagnosed with depression, after a series of psychologists and psychiatrists, at the age of 16. They gave me antidepressants, but I didn't take them.I didn't have the required level of patience to wait for them to work. I was self-harming at the time, because it was almost the only thing that made it feel better. I'd been cutting myself since the age of 13, and I couldn't stop. I did it so badly once that i ended up in the Royal Infirmary for the night. I stayed in a hostel at the time, and came back with a bandage on. One of my friends commented on it, and I just lied and said it was a sprain. I had to cover it up all the time, because the fear of being judged is always there. 
I just drank all day, got stoned, cut myself and cried alot. This might seem a little bizarre to some people, but I knew not much else. I was at my lowest point.


There was a whole lot more to come my way before I could start to feel ok again, however. The drinking damaged my stomach, and I'll probably never drink vodka again. I have hundreds of scars, have seen many doctors, and have taken many pills.
In August 2009, I was finally given a correct diagnosis. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, which in short, makes the sufferer have quick mood changes, and a warped self-image among many other things. I am now on the correct level of medication, and I just have to take each day as it comes. I still get my really rubbish days where I just cry for completely no reason, but not as often now. 


I'm not cured. I'll never be cured. But my illness isn't going to get the better of me like it used to, I just need to keep it under control. There isn't much else that can be done about it. BPD is a part of me, and I am no longer ashamed of it. 


So I am sending my loveages to Emma, because although we've both been through different things in our lives, she has inspired me to get this out <3 xxx

30 Day About Me Challenge - Day 2

THE MEANING BEHIND YOUR NAME:


My name is Claire Miller. In French, Claire means 'clear, bright'. True, really :D 
Miller is my stepdad Billy and my mum's surname. My last name used to be Sutherland, but I changed it to Miller in 2007. I felt that being a Sutherland was associating me with Neil (my biological dad) too much, because he was never really a dad. I didn't see the point in sharing his name anymore. Changing it to Miller is one of the best things I've ever done. It still needs changing on my birth certificate, as I only changed it by deed poll, so I'll get cracking on that! 
Ooh, also, my mum said that had I been born a boy, I'd have been named Andrew! 





loveages as ever! <3 xxx

Gorgeous Giveaways!!!

This post is just to let you know that two of my gorgeous fellow bloggers have giveaways running!


First of all, we have the adorable Rachel Crawford's cute giveaway from Something Kawaii :D




 Follow This Link to enter! 












The second lovely giveaway is from the new blog by Joanna Maxwell, A Little Taste Of Heaven. It's a Mystery Giveaway, but I know it'll be awesome! I've already entered! :D

Enter here: Joanna's Giveaway!







Loveages as ever! Til next time <3 xxx